A steely resolve
But of the pair, it is only Dog whose excuse holds any sway.
Following my decision to lose any and all puppy fat in time for our impending nuptials, Scottish extracted husband-in-training (SHIT) appears to have resolved to do precisely the opposite.
Dog, never normally one to avoid causing a dispute, hovers somewhere in the middle - his weight gain or loss entirely dependent on how much cheese he has consumed at the time of his weigh in. Besides which, having learnt he'd missed the cut for the wedding guest list, he really couldn't give a continental either way.
When we first met, SHIT was an excessively fit rugby player capable of running entire marathons without breaking a sweat. In contrast, I was a slightly rotund non-exerciser who - in her less honourable moments - used to summon the ride-on mower just to check the letterbox.
But there is nothing so good as the threat of a trained camera or video lens to help break the habits of a lifetime.
In a quite extraordinary turn of events, it is now I who is quite literally working her bum off with cycling, netball and yoga a part of my daily routine. And it is SHIT who - in his more energetic moments - gets the stitch just reaching for a piece of pizza.
In his defence SHIT does have a bung hip - an exact replica of Dog's - which his specialist has hinted might need to be replaced at some time in the future.
But, while I admit this may have some impact on his ability to complete physical activity, I see it as no excuse for the devious tactics he has employed to get me to wallow with him in his dangerous game of gastronomic gluttony.
With more free time on his hands than ever before, I arrive home each day to find SHIT beckoning me, a packet of crisps, a smattering of takeways and a beer always at hand.
But rather than giving in to this foolish temptation, it has merely hardened my resolve.
Which, while we're on the subject, is also the view of the Newcastle and Hunter Valley retailers struck down by the devastating storms thrust their way over recent weeks.
Already having to contend with putting their winter stock on sale early, owing to what was then considered a relatively mild winter, as well as rising leasing costs, they had just begun to claw their way back to profitability when the worst weather in three decades arrived on their doorstep.
Facing at best a large reduction in trade and stock loss and at worst the prospect of losing their businesses entirely, the humble storeowners all managed to retain perspective.
While the weather, looters and other unmentionables had conspired to kick these hardy battlers when they were already down, they refused to hang their heads and feel sorry for themselves.
While admitting they had been hit hard, each spoke of their intention to continue trading, peppering their speech with such optimistic phrases such as "we won't be so badly affected as some" and "we're just going to plough on through."
Whether you're battling enemies inside your own house or outside of your business, I reckon there's a lot to be said for keeping the turkeys in their place.