Fraserlive: I have a dream

Or rather, I had a nightmare, in which I was a big supplier to a major department store and I received a letter which said: The following conditions of supply are designed to make our business together fair, transparent and mutually beneficial, expressing the utmost respect between our company and you, our most cherished supplier.

Official orders must have 18 signatures to be valid, but such orders do not guarantee that the goods will be accepted. And if they are, we can send them back when ever we like.

All goods must be individually wrapped in approved quality paper stamped with the company's emblem. Tickets must show content, department, and price. Under separate cover please supply sticky labels showing prices reduced by 50, 70 and 90 per cent.

Our company will pay promptly within 90 days of forward dated invoice but will make the following deductions:
Settlement discount: 5 per cent
Advertising allowance: 19 per cent
Buyer travel to your showroom to view and purchase your goods: 10 per cent
Buyers' Christmas provident fund: 10 per cent
Checking, double checking and triple checking: 12 per cent
Markdown allowance: 25 per cent
Photocopying, computer fees and paper clips: 8 per cent
Credit card handling fees: 5 per cent
Contingency fund: 5 per cent

If you total the above deductions you will find it comes to 99 per cent. You have the choice of receiving one per cent of your invoice by bank transfer, but it is probably more profitable for you to just to give us the bloody goods.

Supplier rev-ups
Meanwhile back in the real world of shops and more shops, I wonder at the value of big retailers gathering suppliers together for a good talking to. Both David Jones and Myer seem fond of the idea. The most recent was a Myer event at the NSW Art Gallery in which Myer scared the tripe out of basic suppliers by telling them Myer intended to bump up its own sourcing of core products from around 15 per cent to 20 per cent. MD Bernie Brookes reportedly impressed his audience with an articulate presentation about building the strength of the 60 stores but didn't spend time on the contribution made by his suppliers.

In order to defuse a volley of ripe tomatoes, he avoided mentioning some changes in relationships with suppliers that have subsequently come to light. For instance, effectively immediately, the discount offered for seven days settlement is now the discount offered for 30 days. Also effective immediately is a change to packaging. Products must arrive in special size boxes which are discarded when the goods are unpacked in each store. More packing equals more waste equals more trees equals more carbon. The suddenness of the decision has left many suppliers scrambling to get the designated boxes and, as we know, when it is a sellers' market, buyers pay through the nose.

One of the points made continually by older members of the fashion industry is that the fun has gone out of it. Suppliers and buyers certainly used to do battle but there was a certain respect exchanged. They didn't lose sight of the fact that there were people behind the rack of samples. That, sadly, seems to have gone. Now numbers rule and people are machine-like, especially the more ambitious ones. I'm sounding like a cranky old bugger, I know, but I lived through a time when there was plenty of lust and laughs, and I loved it.

Doubtless Bernie needs to squeeze suppliers because it's his job. However, at an event like the one at the art gallery, he might have served up a bit of ear-candy even if he didn't mean it. It could have turned out to be the most cost effective way to get the result he wanted.

Miserobilia
On the face of it there is not much connection between pop star tours and schmuttas until you realise that accompanying each concert tour is a massive sell of memorabilia, usually headed by the humble t-shirt. Some big tours can sell 50,000 of them.

Obviously the supply of these goods gives our locals some nice business. While the t-shirt blanks might be imported, printing and packaging are usually carried out in Australia.

Unhappily, not so in the case of our Aussie-by-marriage boy, Keith Urban, who married Nicole Kidman. While fans will be able to buy souvenirs of Keith's tour, including many examples of his head emblazoned thereupon, the whole lot, ready to sell, will arrive from the US in a container. Expectant Australian suppliers, salivating over the order, have now found that their saliva was wasted. They say that Keith is probably the first visiting artist to BYO souvenirs. Even Bono instructed his merchandise machine to print and package in Australia.