They've got the sheets

Although bed sheets are not strictly garments (except in American movies when the spent lovers hop out of bed wrapped in a sheet to unfairly hide their private anatomy), a recent announcement by Australian Customs has been given more than a passing fearful glance by the local garment sewing industry.

It all began last year when Sheridan applied for duty-free entry of its bed sheets on the grounds bed sheets in general are not made in Australia. Customs looked around and found no obvious manufacturers of sheets and so concluded duty-free entry wouldn't hurt anybody. Customs gave notice in the Commonwealth Gazette (particularly good for curing insomnia) of the application last September. Apparently no sewers of bed sheets read the Gazette and so Customs innocently proceeded to confirm the duty-free status late in January - also in the Gazette.
When the news eventually seeped through, out came Australian sheet sewers screaming foul. They pointed out that 12 million square metres of sheeting fabric had been imported into Australia in the past 12 months and they'd effing well cut and sewn most of it.
Short run, Australian-made sheets have special thread colours so that the likes of the Hilton Hotel doesn't get the Hyatt's sheets back from the laundry by mistake and cause a bed-lead revolt among patrons. Hospitals are in the same boat, although their bed occupiers find it more difficult to storm out in a huff, holding high their intravenous drips.
The injustice was heightened by leaving the duty of 15 per cent on sheeting fabric, so that the local manufacturers were further disadvantaged in trying to compete with imports.
It is likely that the local sheeters might seek a revocation of the duty removal but, in the meantime, all sheet importers can now ask for a rebate of duty from September 28, 2005 when the announcement was made. And that will cost the government a pretty penny.
I have some sympathy for Customs because sheet sewers are kind of below the radar.
No doubt the fracas will be resolved, but it does indicate that the TCF plan, which promised no mucking around with duties until 2011, is dissolving fast. Now duty does not apply to goods from about 60 countries considered blamelessly wobbly, and we're looking at a free trade agreement with China.
This is happening at a time when local sewing is showing signs of sitting up in its coffin as clothing companies find that the higher prices of local manufacture are often offset by quicker delivery and more control over quality. Before the government makes it totally impossible for local sewing to survive it might think about preserving what's still around. For sewing to be totally in the hands of foreign factories is not a comforting thought.
Somebody said to me recently that the reason Australia's inflation rate has been relatively low for the last 12 years is the progressive lowering of duty on Chinese imports. The end of that road is fast approaching.
The parasites fight back
If you're not a fashion agent please do not read this. It is intended for the eyes of fashion agents.
Okay, now that we've removed the unauthorised persons, I have been told of a way to make principals pay long-owing commission.
When you receive the next new range you go out and sell like buggery. When you have all the orders in, and signed, you tell your tight-wad principal that you've taken orders for, say, half a million dollars worth of garments but you won't send him the individual orders until he pays what he owes you. He'll say that's unreasonable because he must have time to order the fabric and organise the making, so send him the orders and he'll send your commission, um, pretty soon. Now you're faced with a dilemma. Once you send him the orders your name falls back down the creditors' list to the bottom - where it usually resides. If you don't send him the orders he might sue you for impeding his business with malicious intent.
I pause here to quote one well-known manufacturer who refers to his agents as "parasites". I tell you this is to harden your resolve to follow my advice.
You do the following. Photocopy all the orders you're holding and then cut off all the tops where it shows the retail customer's name. Send these lower-part copies to your principal with your love and a bunch of flowers. He can now go ahead and get the goods made but he can't send them out until he knows who the buyers are. No commission, no buyers, no deliveries.
Repeat orders can be used by employing the same method to scare up more recent commission owing, and your normally slothspeed principal may even upgrade your commission statements to the must-pay basket where he keeps his electricity bill.